If one of you is dairy free, drinks a certain type of organic coffee or huffs a specific color of spray paint, the other must have it on hand. Unless it’s understood that you are both way into your privacy, in which case, exchange flannel shirts.
You may also include emojis in your texts without apology. End of Month Ten: You must meet each other’s parents unless 1.
Hardly a week goes by without another new think piece about online dating either revolutionizing society or completely ruining our ability to have real relationships.
But these hyperbolic pronouncements miss a deeper fact: At its core, "online dating" isn't something we just started doing 5, 10 or even 20 years ago.
She later settles the matter after an apology from the paper.• April 14, 2007: William and Kate are confirmed to have split.
Where there’s a rule there’s significantly less chance you’ll humiliate yourself when your expectations don’t line up with reality—that’s what I always say. The one time I tried to sell mugs, I had to truncate it to “Where there’s a rule there’s sig—” and no one knew what I was talking about but my mother bought 12 because she’s very supportive, which explains why I have two liberal arts degrees. You’re not yet allowed to sleep over, but you should make sure you both agree on at least one of the following: 1. End of Month One: At this point, you need to reveal the kink it will least freak you out to reveal.
(By “cat person,” I literally mean part cat.) If one of you is not out, this must be disclosed now.
End of Month Two: By now both of you will need to have friended each other on Facebook, gone grocery shopping together at least once (a midnight Liz Lemon Greek Froyo run doesn’t count), purchased new sex toys and made reference to some future, nebulous plan.
(Prior to this, texting while on a date was allowed only in the case of family illness or lost cats.) Rides to the airport and train station are mandatory.You must have at least seven inside jokes, three of which CANNOT involve sex.End of Month Five: By now, expect to have spent at least 72 hours straight together. At Ten and a Half Months: If one of you is a performer, it is no longer necessary for the other to attend your events. End of Month Twelve: You may CONSIDER moving in together—for another three months at which point you may submit a query letter, writing sample, blood sample, credit score, and a pound and a half of licorice all sorts to my PO Box.Example: “For halloween, we should tots dress up as Marty Mc Fly and Doc from Back to the Future,” or “My mom makes a mean pot roast.You’ll have to try it sometime.” Drug addicts and alcoholics, reveal yourselves.End of Month Three: If you are the monogamous types, you’ve now decided not to see other people. When one of you texts, the other MUST reply within three hours. If one of you is a performer, the other must attend one of your events.If she has a favorite book, you have one week from now to read it.He later switches to a geography course.• March 2002: William pays £200 to watch Kate modelling a sheer black lace dress over a black bra and bikini bottoms in a charity catwalk show.• April 2002: William and Kate go flathunting to find a house for their second year.• September 2002: They move into a student house with two other friends including former Etonian Fergus Boyd.• May 2003: William and Kate are pictured deep in conversation at a rugby match.• June 2003: Clarence House denies that William is romantically involved with close friend Jecca Craig, the daughter of wealthy conservationists based in Kenya.• June 2003: Kate attends William's 21st birthday party at Windsor Castle.• The Prince insists in an interview to mark his birthday that he does not have a steady girlfriend.• September 2003: William, Kate and their two flatmates move into a cottage in the third year.• Christmas 2003: William and Kate are believed to have become an item after she splits from her previous boyfriend, a former St Andrews student.• March 2004: William and Kate's romance is exposed after they are pictured on the ski slopes of Klosters together.Clarence House do not deny they are dating.• On the same holiday, William is reported to have said: "I don't want to get married until I'm at least 28 or maybe 30."• April 9, 2005: Kate is not invited to the wedding of the Prince of Wales and Camilla Parker Bowles in Windsor.• June 2005: Kate joins William at the wedding of his close friend Hugh van Cutsem• June 2005: William and Kate graduate in the same ceremony at St Andrews and attend a celebratory lunch together joined by their families.• July 2005: The pair enjoy a romantic holiday at the Lewa Downs game reserve in Kenya, owned by the parents Jecca Craig.• October 2005: Kate's lawyers - the same used by the Prince of Wales - ask newspaper editors to leave her alone, claiming she is being hounded by photographers.• Autumn 2005: There are reports that the relationship has cooled off.• November 2005: William tells an All Blacks rugby player at a Palace reception the relationship is going well.• January 2006: William is photographed kissing Kate in public for the first time during a skiing break in Klosters.• Days later, William begins his Army training at the Royal Military Academy, Sandhurst.• March 2006: Kate, without William, is invited into the Royal Box at the Cheltenham Gold Cup. There is cuddling, but no one spends the night and no one worries about why no one spent the night. Third Date: If one person has been paying, the other person pays. Swearing to campaign for a pro-marriage equality candidate or volunteer at a soup kitchen is the same thing as actually doing it. If one of you uses a unicycle as her main form of transportation, this must be disclosed now. If one of you is a Republican, this must be disclosed now.