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That's how I remember thinking about the best sex I'd ever had, in that moment.
That's a question I've been asking myself for a long time.
I've had a complicated relationship with sex for as long as I can remember—as I'm sure most of us probably do.
When he got to my apartment, I immediately felt pressured by him to say yes and we ended up having sex that was not only dissociative but completely disembodying.
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I grew up in a very conservative, religious environment where any mention of sexuality was forbidden.
I was sexually assaulted when I was 12 and consequently had all of my sexual agency taken from me.
If I felt desire, I'd instantly clam up with fear and shame.
Sexuality was becoming my enemy rather than my friend.