I can say that I finally grasped the reasons that are responsible for making American dating culture so complex and so radically different from pretty much dating in any other country.And these reasons have less to do with American women specifically than with American culture as a whole.Southern European cultures have pretty tough and “masculine” women; the stereotypical traditional Italian wife, for example, is very “tough” and “ball-busting” as demonstrated by her ability to run the house hold and even control her tough Italian husband. I wanted to put American dating under the microscope and study it like a scientist who studies microorganisms in his science lab.
After mutual interest is established, the next step is to immediately move onto more interesting and physical things. In America, you don’t get out of this discussion phase. It requires a certain level of confidence and self-esteem. On the other hand, a discussion about generally accepted things isn’t risky and therefore doesn’t require much confidence.
The girl was strongly into the discussion, so I had to keep chugging along, listening to her viewpoints and, in exchange, share with her my own opinions.
It felt completely unnatural to drop the discussion and transition into emotional flirting.
It’s the natural outcome of what happens when two people who are attracted to each other meet and display this attraction to each other. It’s been established that you both like each other.
It’s a sexually-charged private conversation between two adults, not a watered-down public discussion that’s designed to be displayed to the entire country on a morning talk show. That’s why you go out to a bar or a club after a hard day’s work: to let your rational mind take a break and enjoy an emotional conversation with a beautiful woman who you want to take home—and who wants to be seduced and taken home by you as well. You’re not on some public talk show on primetime TV.